Why can’t I hold your baby?

BY MELISSA GERSTEIN

I love to hold babies. Any baby, not just my own. I cannot help myself. If I see a baby, I need to hold him or her.

Do all moms want to hold newborns? Why do I feel the need to hold everyone’s newborn baby especially when they are crying? Is it a mother’s instinct to scoop up a new baby and snuggle or is it the empathy I feel when they cry?

At times, I will see new mothers struggling in the park and I will just walk right up and ask if they need help and offer to hold their baby. One time a woman handed me her baby after I struck up a conversation about her “hooter hider”. Some moms want the extra help with their babies, and some look at me like I’m crazy. One time, I asked a mom if she was alright while she was holding her wailing newborn and her toddler who just fell off a slide. I asked if she wanted me to hold her baby while she tended to her crying son and she looked at me with disgust. Maybe I offended her or she was having some difficulty, or maybe she thought I was insane?

At times I want to hold other people’s babies so badly that there is this uncontrollable yearning inside me. I love their smell and the way they curl up around you and the newborn breath is heaven.

I’m trying to hold on as tight as I can to my two-year-olds “babyness”. I know I’m on the tail end of it disappearing forever. I still rock her to sleep and she still has a bottle. I know she’s my last baby so I’m holding on for dear life. I should have contacted a Newborn Photographer to take her picture so I could always be able to look at that photograph and relive those memories time and time again!

When I had my babies, I was in such a fog and it was so hard to always enjoy some of those newborn moments. I found myself struggling to just get through the day. I would forget to savor those newborn days where they squirm to stretch and those lovely first smiles that have now disappeared in a flash. I know its not all fun and games. There’s the problem of being kept up late at night, wiping poop with Pampers baby wipes, but I don’t mind. I loved those moments when i had a newborn (I still love them so much now though of course). I miss things like that though like even just getting something like a new travel stroller is something that I miss… crazy right? I know that there are some women though who get nannies, or au pairs to help them out and I get why they do that. Sometimes having children can just get too much and you need that extra help. I’ve noticed an increase in demand for au pairs, particularly since parents have become far too busy recently. So if this is something that you are interested in then you can easily check out something like this Cultural Care Au Pair to give you a better idea of how you can apply and what you should expect. There’s no harm in asking someone else to help you though, so if you are struggling a bit then ask for help.

But now more than ever I crave those newborn snuggles. Does that mean I want another baby? Or is it normal for me to feel this was because my children are getting older? Do all moms feel they want another baby when their baby becomes a toddler? I look at my pregnancy photos and wonder if I could do it again. So as I struggle with this emotion, for now, please just let me hold your baby.

Do you want to hold other people’s babies?

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